Curb Your Broad

I was eating lunch with a friend at the lovely little Land Park establishment called Central Valley Coffee, when a lady came in from the patio area and in a flurry asked, "Did anyone leave their dog outside? It is running around without a leash!"

Since my hearing is quite dotty and I wasn't facing her or actually paying attention, I heard something else entirely. "Did you say Broad??!!"

"Now why would I say Broad?" the woman asked in a huffy snit. She was sooo offended she actually sniffed and tossed her head.

But of course my friend and I burst out laughing at my silly translation of the word 'Dog' as did the ENTIRE COFFEE SHOP!!. It's a small place, and the woman had been quite the attention getter to begin with.

We laughed so hard about it, I was quite the hit of the party I assure you!

Of course my friend and I had to remark between ourselves what a surly, non-humorous woman that was!

But when she came back inside to take her seat, she gave me a big grin and a bit of a wave.

I decided that it must have taken her a second to get the joke, which was at least some comfort to me. When we left I was determined to take my leave of her in a funny fashion, and as her table was near the exit door, I said, "Don't forget to Walk your Broad!" as we passed.

I got a hateful scowl in return. Hot thunder bolts of menace shot from her eyes. My friend and I skedaddled from her presence as quickly as possible, laughing all the way to the car.

In a moment here came the sourpuss, and she had a BIG smile on her face and was nodding and laughing towards us.

I think she had some kind of condition. Delayed Reaction Syndrome is my guess. So then I couldn't resist one more volley:

"Always tie up your Broad before entering a coffee shop!"