Monday, December 04, 2006

Attack of the Alien Nano-bots


I've been having a sudden and intense resurgance of my original stroke symptoms, leading me to believe I've had another stroke that I didn't know I had or else terrifying me with the fear that I have sudden onslaught and a rare rapid-progressive strain of Alzheimer's.

My doctor seems to think I have MS.

I have to go to a neuroligist but they don't have any appointments available until mid-February. You know, because this is URGENT.

And in order to apply for Medi-Cal (the California version of Medicaid) you have to be disabled, over 65, pregnant or an illegal alien of Hispanic speakage. I'm not kidding. I'm white, a taxpayer and just the working poor so I cannot qualify for my own taxpaying program of Medi-Cal.

So which is faster? Marry a man named Jose Guitterez, get knocked up or fake my age as being over 65?

All I know is, I must be disabled in order to apply for Medi-cal. The technical definition of disabled is that you've had a proper diagnosis by an expert physician. I can't get into see an expert because I can't pay for it. When I call these places they say, "Just apply for Medi-Cal." I tell them, I can't apply for Medi-cal unless I've been declared disabled FIRST. And they always say, "Oh, that's right. I forgot about that. Sorry, can't help you."

But fear not, gentle readers. I'm taking my medical well being into my own hands. I will heal myself with prayer and the use of a tin foil hat. Wish me Luck!


LauraJ said...

Big big big hugs to you!
Sending you healing vibes and tin foil hat wishes.
More big hugs

Janet said...

I'm also sending you good thoughts and healing vibes....laughed at your last line about the tin foil hat!! I guess it helps to have a sense of humor when dealing with bureaucracy!!

June said...

Yes, indeed, tin foil hats are the trick to resolving this.

Seriously, I truly wish you the best and hope that things get sorted out very soon and in a more reasonable fashion. I do not understand the way people think these days. However, here is an idea: I had a kidney stone attack at work one time, an ambulance came and fetched me off to the hospital where I was left to rot in the hallway for 5 hours without ever being seen. There weren't but one or two other patients being treated. A fellow walked into the ER right off the street and said, "I have a drinking problem and think that maybe I need to go to rehab." They took him immediately and I was sent home without being seen to tough it out on my own (and I had great insurance). Nevermind what words I had to make up that day 'cause I ran out of all the good curse words. My point: just walk into the hospital and say you've a drink/drug problem and you'll get a complete evaluation ASAP. Apologize for the deception later but it seems to me a potential stroke victim is high priority.

PEA said...

Well you do look kinda cute with that tin foil hat on!! hehe Oh dear, isn't it just so frustrating when you can't get the help you need...I do so hope you can figure out what you can do!! I was so excited when I saw your card in my mailbox today...oh it's just soooo gorgeous, thank you so very much!!! To know that you made the card yourself means that much more to me...I love it, thank you Karla!! xoxo

Puss-in-Boots said...

Dear Karla

I'm so sorry to hear of your difficulties. And I thought the Australian medical system was cactus! Here's hoping you get some joy sooner rather than later.

Big (((hugs))) and you're in my thoughts and prayers.

eden said...

i am wishing you well from tennessee! hope you find a way to craft your way out of it! you know, if the hat doesn't work.

June said...

Haven't heard from you in a while so I wanted to drop you a note saying I hope things are okay.